You move through the room like breathing was easy.

I'm chasing my tail whilst you chase your dream.

Lately i've been having this extreme obsession with creating music. I've always played the piano and over the years it has become my 'go-to' when shit hits the fan, but with all the traveling i do it's just too unpractical considering i can't carry it around, bla bla bla, so i started playing the uke. Yeah, that's short for ukulele and yeah i call it the uke, coz i'm super chill and laid back like that.

So here i am, 27 years old, writing lyrics for broken hearts, strumming on this thing day and night like i got someone to sing for. Just another trait to add to my list of crazy. Sometimes i ring my friends and make them listen to me play my songs on speaker phone. I don't think i'm very good yet, but my girls don't give dat fuq, they think everything i do is brilliant and vice versa and that's why we're friends.

If i get too full of myself i might post a video.

Woe.

Bad liver and a broken heart.

Days have been long and nights have been lonely. Summer is passing like a flash and i am having mixed emotions about it. For those who don't know me i am built by millions of tiny particles of crazy and it's not always easy to keep all of that in place. I've been trying to be this "fine" person lately, no not 'good looking "fine"', or 'fine, ill come with you to the cemetery at midnight to smoke a bowl "fine"', simply 'i'm doing fine "fine"'. Too much? Told you i was crazy.

I don't know if i'm anywhere near being fine, but we're okay. Work is hard, mood is light, sky is bright, heart's still heavy at night but we're okay, me and my crazy.

Prison's not that bad and I'll wait for you.

Bring your heaven down here.

You were always perfect. The way you went about things. Your hard work, family values and the way you loved your three girls. I will never stop needing you and your guidance in my life. It will never get easy and no one will ever take your place. Every time i fall in love with a person, a city, a song or a moment, i wish you were here. Missing you still feels unreal..

It's been 8 years daddy, but this day will always be your day no matter how many times 8 years pass. 

Happy birthday our angel, we love you.

Sometimes you miss the memories, not the person.

Just like any other sunday i turn into this ambivalent mixture of wanting to run out to an open field of flowers in a tiny crochet creation and feel the wind in my hair, and bury myself in a sea of blankets and put on music that breaks my heart while i think of everything that could have been. Yep, that's me. My friends and family have learnt to love me. Maybe you will too, someday.

Someday.

When that someday comes and I have grown on you and you have fallen in complete and utter love with my heart and you can't imagine any other 'someday' without me, that's when we start creating memories that will last forever.

Lay your body next to mine and you'll have no regrets.

Sally hearts Margo.

The bff Sally is back from NYC with the rest of my cc mommas and i am stoked to say the least! Most of all because i've been all over the place with my messy piece of a heart lately and she gave me a serving of tough love this morning that was exactly what i needed.

ILOVEYOULIKEWHOA!

Haha, this photo.

Kiss me hard before you go.

My footprints on water.

You are in a city that is not this city, it never was, you never were.

Here.

I held it together, i lifted up, i gave it out. My heart and mind.

W h a t e v e r.

Zero fucks given.

I honestly feel that today marks the beginning of feeling less empty. I'm trying ok? I still think of you. It's so fucking stupid. But it's okay. I know you are happy. I can see it. I like that. I will never be okay with any hoe you call your next girlfriend, but it doesn't mean i'm not happy for you. I wanna be done with this already. I'm so over everything.

Payce.